Sleep unwilling.

I live in a poorly insulated home in New Jersey with a natural gas heating system.  I also live on student loans, so I’ve been reluctant to turn on the heat because natural gas prices suck.  So I don’t mean I’m hesitant to turn it up past 60, rather I’m opposed to turning it on at all.  The dial currently rests all the way to the left, where it’s met below by the thermostat’s dial, frozen in place around 55, a vestige of past residents more willing to trade up for comfort.

But this is a post about sleep, not about frugality in the face of hypothermia.  So sleep.  Perhaps it’s a symptom of SAD (I only link to the pages, I don’t necessarily read them), but as we move further from warm weather, my inclination to go to sleep lessens, leaving me to wake up later and later each day, thereby reinforcing the negative shift in my circadian rhythm.  Eventually it turns into a case of can’t fall asleep and can’t wake up.

I can feel it coming on.  My very own Jekyl, hiding behind countless unheard bands, songs I haven’t written yet, comics I haven’t read, cool mint Cliff Bars I haven’t eaten, and a myriad of totally unnecessary tasks that always, at the time, seem more important than calling it a day.  Here’s where the lack of heat comes in.

It’d be a solid guess to assume that to avoid the bitter cold that has taken up residency in my house, I’d hide under the two down comforters, one fleece blanket, and one knit blanket on my bed to stay warm.  Wrong.  I’ve just taken to putting on two sweaters, thermal underwear, fleece lined pants, and a couple pairs of socks, with gloves and a hat to cover what’s left.  Nothing, not even a chill to my bone marrow, can stop my decline into near insomnia.

I’m hoping this infinitesimally small corner of webspace will help tire me out, so until I find a way to fall asleep at a proper time, I’m going to tell it to my blog, consistency willing.

The Dandy Warhols – Sleep

Sufjan Stevens – Adlai Stevenson (Adlai Video compilation)

This guy shot someone and he did fine, so I like my chances.

Elliott Smith Live @ Maxwell’s, 7/16/96

Some nostalgia, a touch of late night flirting with insomnia, and an ill-advised social networking visit.

Set list:
01 cupid’s trick
02 angeles
03 southern belle
04 between the bars
05 speed trials
06 coming up roses
07 alameda
08 division day
09 easy way out
10 last call
11 say yes

Oh Canada.

Constantines – Brother Run Them Down

I sing so I can sleep. Here’s to that.

Route 46.

Fountains of Wayne – Radiation Vibe

One of my favorite tapes in high school had Fountains of Wayne’s first record on one side and Superchunk’s No Pocky for Kitty on the other side. I think the essence of that tape describes not only my broader taste in music, but probably every song I’ve ever written.

Ryan Adams – Amy (Live @ World Café, Philadelphia, PA, 2000-09-28)

“John, I just started listening to Elliott Smith.”

John crooked his head, pushed his hair from his eyes (this guy had bangs before they were cool) and looked at me. With complete seriousness (at least that’s how I remember it), he asked me, “What, did you just break up with your girlfriend?”

Pavement – Rattled By The Rush

My back was to Jersey, but I made do. There was a clear reflection in her glasses of the high rises, the sunset, and that Lackawanna building. She’d laugh whenever I’d shiver. The wind chill ruined my cool.